Ezra Alexander, "Thrashin' of Jesus The Christ"

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Ezra Alexander writes:

"Thrashin' of Jesus The Christ"

Ezra Alexander,

Mel Gibson is an anti-Semitic asshole. Or... he's a genius...

First Jew shot you get is of slow-mo silver sheckels being thrown at a money grubbing, sniveling Judas by a pack of bloodthirsty Rabbi's.

Jesus gets the shit kicked out of him by the Temple guards and the Rabbi's want him to suffer... why? The movie doesn't give you a clue. (Score a point for Mel if his aim is to get people to read the Bible because I will now just to see what the fuck happened in the book) As for the non-stop shit kicking... the Bible reads that he got slapped. Once.I failed to noticed further mention of Judas in the Gospels.. perhaps I read the wrong version... but in the movie he hangs himself with a rope taken off a maggot infested corpse after being attacked by demonic children led by Satan himself.

I always thought of the Romans as pretty brutal people. They had to be to keep an Empire in line. But according to Mel, Pontius Pilate was a pacifist who really didn't want to hurt anyone.

Rabid Pack of Jews: Kill Jesus.
Pontius Pilate: Oh, no... isn't there another way around this? I don't want to hurt him.
Jews: Kill him!!
PP: Oh, I don't think we should... (wringing his hands in anguish)
Jews: KILL THE SON OF A BITCH!
PP: (Looking very pained by now) Oh... oh... please let's not.

Then finally, after seeing there will be a bloody riot of Jews if he didn't crucify Jesus, he agrees to beat him up a bit. (note: it's also not his fault Jesus gets the beating of a lifetime... he only ordered a roughing up) But that's not good enough... Jews still want him on a cross. So then PP offers them the choice between letting a deranged serial killer (in the Bible, a
robber) loose or.... Jesus. RPoJ's pick the psycho killer and resume demanding Jesus get nailed.

According to a historical text:

Pilate's lack of concern for Jewish sensibilities was accompanied, according to Philo writing in 41 C.E, by corruption and brutality. Philo wrote that Pilate's tenure was associated with "briberies, insults, robberies, outrages, wanton injustices, constantly repeated executions without trial, and ceaseless and grievous cruelty." Philo may have overstated the case, but there is little to suggest that Pilate would have any serious reservations about executing a Jewish rabble-rouser such as Jesus.

In the movie the Romans in charge are painted to be a peaceful sort, almost completely blameless in this whole thing. (Except for the Roman guard types who are painted as brainless neanderthals who just are a little fucked in the head and like to beat things.)

Then there was the evil gleam Mel gave the lead Jew's eye everytime they showed him watching Jesus suffer. He even had Jesus himself flat out say to Pilate in the end, "Oh, don't feel guilty, it's not your fault - it's the Jews." and then you see the Jews cowering in their temple as it shakes and crumbles around them with God's wrath. (If THAT ain't a smack in the head with a board with which is scribbled, "The Jews killed Jesus" I don't know what is.) I don't see where in the Bible it tells of thunderstorms and earthquakes at the time of Jesus' death. Nor of the desperate look of fear in the eyes of the RPoJ's that called for his death.

In the end Jesus screams "It is Accomplished!" And the weird David Lynchian devil creature screams in despair.... what did he accomplish?
In the Bible it reads: When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost.

You also can't expect him to get Mary Magdalene right - she was actually one of Jesus' apostles, most likely his most trusted one (AND quite likely carried his child). People re-wrote that part because then women would have to be allowed to take a bigger role in the church and the men in charge don't want that. In the movie she just stuck by Mary Mother of God's side and cried a lot.

Then there's the overall effect. WAY over the top. It wasn't as gory as I expected (I've seen worse in Kill Bill - but nailing bony parts like hands or feet - or, ahem, wrists as it should be historically, will also gross me out.) It was very brutal, but not what I'd call a gore-fest. The makeup job they did on Jesus' body after being beaten, whipped, and smacked with straps of leather to which were attached pieces of broken glass was impressive.

But again - I gotta say, if you beat someone that much and try to make them carry a big wooden cross - it ain't gonna happen. You'd have passed out way before that point, let alone still be talking once you're hanging from the cross. Son of God or not.

Wait - I'm not done. Then there was the devil. Satan himself/herself, uber white, blue eyed and pasty, skulking around with maggots crawling up his nose watching to see if Jesus can actually take all this suffering. He was just SO out of place, showing up at the oddest moments and then there was this part where he was holding the creepiest looking anti-christ baby. Oy, I tell you.

I got the idea that Jesus was suffering the worst kind of pain, I get that it hurt, I get that it couldn't get any worse so did Gibson REALLY have to take the time for him to fall over ten times in slow motion as he was walking with the cross?

It was mostly the hypocrisy and lies of Christianity that were pissing me off throughout the two hours. That and Mel Gibson being so high up on himself that he feels important enough to rewrite "history." Perhaps he should fess up that he agrees with his father that the Holocaust never happened, eh?

1) were the jews blood thirsty? And if so why is this the only time in ancient history that Jews have been overtly violent?

2) was PP against jew on jew violence and death in general?

3) did the temple really crumble when jesus died?

4) did all of his wounds heal except he ones in his hands?

5) Did a crow really eat the eyeball of the thief that didn't accept jesus as his personal savior?

Is Mel really a genius? I ask because if *I* were a Christian and I watched this over the top shit I would have left the theater ready to renounce my vows and become a Buddist. *I* wouldn't want a God who let his son go through that. Bad enough my God jokingly asked Abraham to kill his kid. Sick joke and all but it doesn't compare. Are Christians really watching this and thinking "yes, this is how it happened..."?

Back to Mel's dad and holocaust deniers in general... why can you accept hearsay about a hippy vampire from 2000 years ago but you can deny what people lived through 50 years ago?

Ugh... what a horrible movie. I wish it weren't about Jesus getting sliced and diced because the Aramaic/Latin dialog was cool, the cinematography was awesome, the costumes were great..."