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Me? or not Me?

Iwas born and raised in the desert southwest, aproduct of Route 66 and all the atavistic mothballs that come along with the rural romanticism of cars pavement and heat. I spent the first 6 years in Needles, Ca. Then move about 70 miles up the road to Kingman, Az. there I recived my pitiful excuse of an education, developed a massive panic disorder and social anxiety. So being the completely Irrational person that I am, I decided that I wanted to be an Artist, a gig that really puts you on the spot. On top of that I decided at about the age of 12, that Dada and Surrealism were the only artforms that seemed to make sense to me. I Had origionally planned to become a writer, but poetry seemed so much more direct and to the point, more bang with fewer words. My Father is a Vietnam Combat Veteran, and Truck Driver from a family of 13 kids. They all came to Oregon in the early 1950's as migrant farmworkers. One branch, my Great Aunt Violet's family stayed back in the Ozarks. My grandmother and Aunt Were all trained as Luthiers, my Grandmother became one of the first female 'Straw Bosses' stringing Hops in the Willamette Valley. My Grandfatherworked as a Brakeman on the now defunct Valley and Siletsz Railroad. My Aunt Violet still plays every year at the Silver City Folk music festival in Arkansas, She plays her handmade fiddles and has been featured on several Traditional folk music compilation albums, as well as an appearance on The Bevely Hillbillys. One of Her Handmade fiddles is now on disply in an Arkansas Meuseum. My mother was Typical Hippie and her side of the family came from uptight Mormon Farming folks in Colorado. My Grandfather on my mom's side was stationed in Nagasaki 6 months after the Atomic bomb was dropped. He Spoke Very little about what he saw, but when he did what he saw was horrifying to him. He would say " Those Poor people didn't deserve that kind of attack" my Dad spoke alot about his experiences in Vietnam and taught me early on to think for myself and don't buy into the Patriotic bullshit that his generation fell for. My father, by the way, volunteered to go to Vietnam thinking he was doing good for his country. He learned very quickly that what he was told was crap. So I became at an early age a Pacifist and shyly and timidly questioned everthing. My Grandmother on my mom's side was a Housewife and a painter. Her principle subjects seemed to be barns and outhouses, most of which where half painted, which I find very intriguing. I inherited all of her Art supplies and paintings after she died. Growing up in a rural town where people really believed it was the old west was strange. I remeber going grocery shopping with my mom and the ranchers would come in wearing holstered pistols and looking as if they just got off the set of a Sergio Leone film. among that social contingency we had the Mexican Immigrants and we lived close to both the Hualapai and Supai reservations. If you ever wan't to feel guilty about being a white American, Go to the Rez. It is truly a sad sight, but strangely beutiful to see how much people will endure to try to have an enjoyable existance. So, I met my Former Girlfriend and current bestfriend in my last year of High school. we went to an Alternative school, and finished there. We decided to move to Flagstaff, Az. because it was in the mountains and it was a college town. We were always curious about Art and Politics, and she, Being a Mexican Immigrant was struggling to find her place. We happened upon a flyer one day about a group that was showing a film about EZLN and we both were instantly captivated. I remember her Being in tears watching what was going on, the Massacres the School of The Americas, she was watching her people being opressed;her grandmother was a full-blood Yaqui I believe, and that was the germ of Her and My Activism. She later went on to help start up an infoshop And traveled to Ft.Benning to the S.O.A Protest. We atteneded several lectures at the University, one was with Father Ray, of the soa watchgroup, and she had lunch with Christian Parenti, whom I only was able to breifly say hello to, but I did manage to read a Portion of his book the title escapes me at the moment, but it was about the prison industrial complex and militirization of the police. I fumbled for a couple of years with American Communism but my Chaotic perspective filtered through my Surrealist lens couldn't accept replacing one government for another. So Anarchism seemed to fit so well with the Ideologies of Dada and Surrealism, that It just felt right. And that leaves me here, still looking Still learning. My Art has never been overtly political by any means, but I have always felt a Solidarity with anyone in the Social Movements, the labor movements (I worked many a year as a janitor and seasonal Landscpe laborer) and I am Militantly opposed to Fascism in any disguise. I chose to put Art first as hopefully an encouragement to others to express themselves and If that's what I accomplish I will Die a happy satisfied person. Leave fame and fortune to the corporate drones, I choose freedom and creation.